Country music. I miss it. Kingston doesn't have a country station which just baffles me coming from Calgary. I filled my MP3 player instead. This music just calms me, makes me think, and reminds me of much of my past. Yes it most times will put me into one of those no-energy, just want to be alone and ponder, moods but I've needed one for a while. My life had been charging ahead lately and I'm so busy most of the time I'm missing it. Even when I'm bored-out-of-my-mind times seem hectic. Right now this music reminds me most of when I lived in Calgary. I miss living with Scott across from Lyndsay Park, I miss talking with the same girl every morning waiting for the bus, I miss walking past Ed's door every morning and seeing him already hard at work. He'd be pouring over some spreadsheet or map and still say 'hi', knowing I was there without looking up. I miss chatting with Donna across the hall about our lots down in Montana. I miss listening to Murray about how Exxon sucks and listening to Bernie about how the company is so great. I could go on for a long time, each memory I think about brings a few more back. I don't miss this place yet but only because I'm still here. (makes sense) I know that Next winter I'll be sitting somewhere, listening to slow country music, and thinking about all the great stuff and all the little stuff I did while I was in Kingston...

Why does time have to go forward. I don't really need a reverse, but at least a brake. I sit through some of the greatest moments of my life wondering why it's going so fast. I wouldn't mind if everyone slowed down for a bit, seeming to float as they moved, saying "hhiiiiiii MMiiiiikkkkkeeee....nnnnoooooooooooooo" in that deep, slow-mo voice. In that moment I could notice 100 things about them and lock it into my memory. I think my life needs a change or I'm going feel very empty....at least while this song is still playing. I must get rid of TV. With 2 hours of straight Friends on every night I think I've seen them all now. It's getting warmer and the days are longer now...so no more. I need to learn how to be good on my rollerblades, I want to practice my pitching, I want to run along the lake with my new headphones on, and I want to be a great cook. I'm going to try and use up all the random food I have at my place this weekend and then after start some real planning. I'm only going to buy exactly what I need for my three meals a day, plus some fruit for snacks. Yes, a new cup cake is being born...maybe one that was baked just a little too long.